Many of my clients are desperately trying to manage tantrums effectively. Did you know that there are two types, “Distress” and “Little Nero” Tantrums? I want to remind you there is no one rule for each class. During distress tantrums, your child is crying; it seems their whole world has fallen apart, and they appear inconsolable. In this tantrum, your child’s neural pathways have not developed from the lower brain to the higher brain.
Click on the video to hear what you can do now.
This means this type needs sensitive handling when you try to reassure your child.
What did you say, and what tone of voice did you use? Do you use statements such as:
- Don’t worry,
- You will feel better,
- It’s okay; it isn’t a big deal.
Without realising it, you may be invalidating or not acknowledging your child’s feelings; you may trigger the stress hormone cortisol, which means your child takes longer to calm down. Click on the video.
For Little Nero Tantrums (a great phrase coined by Margot Sunderland, check out her books. They are great).In this tantrum, the higher brain is activated differently. Your child is using their thinking, rational brain to get what they want; this is the opposite of a distress tantrum. Cortisol is not activated in the same way.
Hold your ground with this one and do not DON’T give IN.
Remember to set family rules and boundaries so you and your child feel safe and contained. I would love to know how you manage your child’s tantrums; leave a reply below.
Be the best parent you can be and try to take one action today to make your child feel safe, secure, and loved.
With love Catherine
