Unfortunately, children are born with an unfinished brain, and they have to develop their capacity for self-control/ self-regulation. Research shows that the way you interact with your child in the early years can have long-term effects on their brain function, chemical balance, and emotional regulation. The Developing Child Institute at Harvard discusses this clearly in this video.
Between the ages of 0-7, it is normal for a child to struggle with executive functioning skills such as:
- Planning
- Organising time and materials
- Making decisions
- Shifting from one situation to another (sequencing)
- Controlling emotions
- Inhibition and impulsivity
- Learning from past mistakes
This may explain why they have emotional and behavioural difficulties such as:
- Tantrums, meltdowns
- Hit, bite, and kick
- Run into a road, or they may not be able to get dressed or follow your instructions
- They may struggle with their siblings and
- Have difficulties at school
- Be oppositional and defiant
Even though your child’s brain is developing, your child’s temperament (a child with a complex character is challenging for parents to manage), your mental health and genetic load may also impact their emotions and behaviour causing everyone distress or anger.
It’s hard to know when to seek help, and there are many reasons parents seek help from me, a trained professional and a mum who has navigated through all the developmental stages. Sometimes parents attend if they feel out of control or disempowered. Even after extensively studying parenting books and experimenting with different approaches, they are still unable to find a solution that works. There are moments when they struggle to find happiness in bonding with their kids and a longing to improve their relationships. Additionally, they have a strong desire for improved connections and teamwork within their family. There are many ways to strengthen your bond, enable collaboration, and feel empowered, so do contact me for a consultation.