Does my Child have ADHD?

It is one of the most common reasons parents contact me. Understandably, the internet makes it very easy to search for a diagnosis, and ADHD is often the first thing that comes up when a child is struggling to concentrate, sit still, or follow instructions. Before I go further, I want to be upfront: I do not carry out ADHD assessments or diagnoses myself. What I can offer is real clarity about what ADHD actually looks like, and genuine, experienced support for your family, whether you are still wondering, waiting for an assessment, or already living with a diagnosis.

What is ADHD?

ADHD stands for attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. It makes it unusually difficult for a child to concentrate, sit still, follow instructions, and manage impulsive behaviour. All young children are distractible and forgetful at times, that is simply part of childhood. What sets ADHD apart is that these behaviours happen far more often, and far more intensely, than would be expected for a child’s age, and they genuinely get in the way of school, friendships, and family life.

The symptoms of ADHD fall into two groups

Inattentive symptoms include making careless mistakes, being easily distracted, seeming not to listen when spoken to directly, struggling to follow instructions, difficulty organising, avoiding tasks that need sustained effort, and frequently losing things.

Hyperactive and impulsive symptoms include fidgeting or squirming, difficulty staying seated or waiting a turn, excessive running or climbing, trouble playing quietly, extreme impatience, seeming constantly on the go, interrupting or blurting out answers, and difficulty settling to sleep.

Some children show mostly one group, some show both. Most children with an ADHD diagnosis have a mix of the two.

Executive functioning is often part of the picture too

Many children with ADHD struggle with planning, organising time and materials, making decisions, shifting between tasks, managing their emotions, and learning from past mistakes. Not every child with these difficulties has ADHD, and not every child with ADHD struggles equally in all these areas, but it is worth knowing they often travel together. It is also worth knowing that learning difficulties like dyslexia, processing or memory difficulties, and attachment difficulties can all present in strikingly similar ways. This is exactly why proper assessment matters, rather than relying on an online checklist alone.

Girls are still being missed

This is something I feel strongly about, and it has become a much bigger conversation in recent years for good reason. Girls with ADHD are consistently less likely to be diagnosed than boys, and when they are diagnosed, it tends to happen later, often not until adolescence or even adulthood. Girls more often present with inattentive symptoms, daydreaming, disorganisation, quietly struggling, rather than the more visible hyperactivity boys tend to show, and diagnostic tools were largely built around that more visible male presentation. That delay is not a small thing. Research has found that girls diagnosed later face significantly greater difficulties with their mental health, education, and social lives by adolescence than girls diagnosed earlier If your daughter seems to be coping outwardly but is quietly exhausted, disorganised, or increasingly anxious, it is worth taking that seriously rather than assuming ADHD “doesn’t look like that.”

How is ADHD diagnosed?

For ADHD to be diagnosed, the difficulties need to be beyond what is typical for a child’s developmental age, present in more than one setting, such as both school and home, and persist over an extended period, not just a few difficult weeks.

Diagnosis is carried out by paediatricians, ADHD nurses, or psychiatrists. In Bristol, the pathway generally begins with a paediatrician, who will take a full developmental and family history, send Conner’s questionnaires to both home and school, and sometimes carry out a school observation. Within CAMHS, clinicians also look at whether school and parent scores align, since a consistent picture across settings matters for an accurate diagnosis.

What treatment looks like

NICE guidelines set out the recommended treatment pathway, and parenting programmes are typically offered first. I am a trained facilitator in the Incredible Years programme, one of the approaches NICE recommends, alongside the Solihull Approach, and I draw on both regularly in my work with families navigating ADHD. Medication may be considered later, depending on your child’s individual needs, and this is always a decision made with your paediatrician.

If you are wondering, waiting, or already living with a diagnosis

However far along you are in this process, you do not need to navigate it alone. If you would like support understanding your child’s behaviour, managing the family dynamics that often build up around ADHD, or simply talking it through, I would love to help.

Interested in working with me?

I offer one to one therapy for children and young people, therapeutic parenting support for parents, and training and consultation for professionals working with children and families. I am a trained facilitator in both the Incredible Years and Solihull Approach programmes. Please do get in touch if you would like to find out more.

You can reach me via my contact page.

Free resources

Understanding Your Child’s Guard Dog Brain explains what is happening in your child’s nervous system when big feelings take over.

Holding in the Storm is about staying steady as a parent in the hard moments.

When Darkness Comes includes specific support for ADHD and sleep difficulties.

All free to download.

References

NICE (2018, updated) Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder: diagnosis and management, NICE guideline [NG87].

Martin, J. et al. Antecedents and outcomes of a later attention deficit hyperactivity disorder diagnosis in females. British Journal of Psychiatry.

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With warmth,
Catherine