Anger can be a complex emotion but it is very typical. Generally, children have yet to develop the social and emotional skills to express themselves directly. I know that many of you would prefer that your child did not say it all; it’s just not nice to be angry,! But you know I believe that all emotions can be expressed safely. Accepting and allowing your child to describe a range of emotions is healthy; research shows that simply drawing with your child helps improve their mood. You can check out the study here https://www.apa.org/monitor/2014/06/arts-creativity.
Here are a few of my creative ideas; I’ve tried to offer different mediums, art, movement, sound, etc. Please note these ideas are not for those occasions when your child is out of control but are intended to allow exploration of “Big Feelings” Remember to be balanced. If they roar like a tiger, can they also be a quiet and calm mouse?
5 Creative Ways to Express Anger
1. Let’s be a Roaring Animal
Children are naturally imaginative and ready to explore and become something other than themselves. When you start to notice “hot feelings”, help them out of it simply by saying:
“let’s be a big roaring animal”, “let’s roar it out “.They may be a tiger, a lion, or even an elephant. Then encourage them to breathe; a giant tiger’s breath will help them calm and relax. They may then be able to move to be quiet, calm animals.
2. Expressive Scribbles
Give your children some art materials. Younger children may benefit from finger paints. Encourage them to ” draw out their feelings” by simply asking what it would be like to be angry, frustrated, or irritated. Remember to help them to return to calm or happy feelings. Talk to them about the scribbles, the colours they have used, and how it feels. If you gently practice this, it can be used before a moment of escalation.
3. Creative Music
I trained in Arts Psychotherapy and loved banging a drum, tapping a tambourine or expressing my feelings through a glockenspiel. You don’t need to buy expensive instruments; you could fill some tin cans or plastic bottles. Give you and your child an expressive moment for 10 minutes. By accepting and allowing the feeling to be expressed, you may notice a change in mood.
4. Let’s bite, rip and express the feelings
When you have been angry, have you ever felt you wanted to get your teeth into something? Well, how about biting into a carrot, it’s fun and better than your child grinding their brother or sister. They could rip a tissue or old paper too.
5. Sing and Move it out
Children are very receptive to sound, so sing out the feelings and move the surface out. Play the moving feeling game. This is a bit like the scribble game. Put some music on and ask them to show you what’s it like to be sad, angry, frustrated, or irritated. Move it out. You may want to ask: Does the mad, painful, disappointed, or uncomfortable feeling have a sound?
I hope these are helpful and fun. Allow your creativity to flow between you and your child. Remember these ideas are not for the moments that your child is out of control, in a meltdown or tantrum. For more on how to help your child regulate, click here>> https://bristolchildparentsupport.co.uk/how-do-we-help-our-children-to-self-regulate/<< There is a free two-page download here too.
For more ideas on Positive Discipline, I hope to see you at my two-part Positive Discipline Workshop, Facebook or contact me for a consultation. With Love Catherine
