Bullying, some of you may be rejoicing that it’s the start of term. Still, many children have feelings of dread, anxiety, and trepidation due to the possibility of being bullied at school, on the way, or in the playground. It’s a topic close to my heart, so I have created a short video covering all you may need to know about the ugly truth of bullying. You can either watch it or scroll down to read it.
1. What is Bullying?
The definition of bullying is when an individual or a group of people with more power repeatedly and intentionally cause hurt or harm to another person or group. It is not a one-off event; it is considered bullying if it is repeated and an imbalance of power.
Children are bullied for many reasons:
- Physical appearance
- Sexual bullying
- Racist/faith-related bullying
- Bullying about sexual or gender identity
- Disability and chronic health conditions ( NSPCC)
2. The Impact of Bullying
This is more than a part of just growing up. It can cause long-term brain changes that lead to cognitive and emotional effects as severe as harm by child abuse. Consequently, victims can struggle with social confidence, anxiety, low self-esteem, depression and drug misuse that can continue into adulthood. They often do not say anything due to feeling ashamed and hopeless, worried the bully will retaliate and concerned no one will believe them.
3. Warning Signs, your child could be being bullied
- Bedwetting
- Panic Attacks
- Isolating themselves from family and school activities
- Sudden illness, especially before school
- Poor Sleep and Nightmares
- Aggression
- Not wanting to go to school
- Asking for money
- Heightened anxiety around social media/mobile phones
4. How not to raise a Bully
Don’t repeatedly discipline through criticism, shame, commands, and physical chastisement.
5. Bully- Proof your Child:
- Use Positive Discipline in your parenting
- Please encourage your child to talk about their feelings
- Help your child develop a socially confident personality
- Find activities they can feel good about themselves, help them to make friends, and monitor and Supervise their online presence, 1 in 10 young people 8 -17 have “gone live” on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube
- Take Sibling fighting seriously; it is often minimised by parents and has profoundly affected many adults I’ve seen in counselling.
- Get a pet
6. What to do if they are being bullied!
- Listen, don’t react by getting angry and upset
- Tell them it’s not their fault
- Tell them that you and they need to think about going forward; what are their ideas?
- Look at helpful websites ( I have put some at the end of my video and the end of the page)
- Don’t tell them to ignore the bullies.
- If at school, look at the school bullying policy, follow their procedures
Arrange to speak to a teacher. - Some schools have peer support, school counsellors and learning mentors
If that fails, access outside help!
References and Websites that can help you now!
- https://www.anti-bullyingalliance.org.uk/
- http://www.bullying.co.uk/
- https://www.nspcc.org.uk
- https://www.livescience.com/53034-childhood-bullying-lasting-mental-health-effects.html
- https://www.saferinternet.org.uk
Share the help and support anti-bullying week at # Antibullying week from the 13th to the 17th of November 2017; I will post more later. With Love Catherine
